Tuesday, March 16, 2010

To the other places..

"Out there things can happen and frequently do
to people as brainy and footsy as you.
And when things start to happen, don't worry, Don't stew.
Just go right along.
You'll start happening too. "
-Dr. Suess (once again from Oh, the Places You'll Go!)

My nerves are shot. The pit in my stomach feels endless.

Tomorrow at 12:05 a yellow school bus with the Jefferson County Public Schools insignia predominately displayed across it’s middle will pull up to our curb. This 13 ton vessel of steel will transport my daughter (and all that goes with her) twelve miles (that’s an hour or bus time) to Fletcher Miller Special School where she will attend her first day of preschool.

And I will be at work. Where I should be. Because if I wasn’t and I had to watch that 13 tons of steel drive away with my daughter- the first time she will be in someone else’s care outside the home (and hospital, of course) the strongest prescription of Xanax wouldn’t suffice. So I will sit at work, watching the clock, counting down every minute until my baby girl begins her first day of school.

And she will enjoy every minute of it.

This might come as a shock with the post that preceded this one, especially when the next few months hold such huge implications for Faith’s future health. Yes, we are running the risk of exposing her to lots of germs- ok it’s not even a risk- there will be lot’s of germs. Yes, she is bound to catch a something. Yes, this could risk her not being able to have the necessary surgeries that could result another year with the trach. But really when it came down to it there was no choice.

Childhood is waiting, and it’s time for Faith to have her fair share.

:) J & CO.


Anonymous said...

Oh Jen I am sitting here with my heart open and my prayers are being sent your way right now. I am sure this has to be one of the hardest times of your life. God's strength in your AMAZES ME, Truly amazes me! You are truly a mom who loves her daughter and you want her to experience what it means to LIVE A FULL LIFE! God Bless you!! I think so many times we can become selfish and so scared that respond in FEAR ABSOLUTE FEAR, and Here you are Sending your precious gift from heaven out into the world because you CHOSE LOVE!! Blessings to you ! I love you and I am so proud of you my friend, SO PROUD! LOVE YOU!!

Katie Oliver

Alicia said...

Praying for you, friend, that you will find peace and comfort in letting your baby go. Praying for Faith, that she will have such a fun time at school and will stay well in the process.

What a huge step, Little Butterfly! We are so proud of you Faith!

Sara & Daryl said...

We are so excited for Faith! What a big girl!

Anonymous said...

I am just now reading your blog, which is shortly after Faith will have come home from her first day of school. I hope it went well for her (and you). You are doing an amazing job with Faith! Keep up the good work!

Lynn Miller

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